Let me introduce myself ...

... c'mon, you know me.

But you may not know my BFF.

Spicy Chai Latte.

Spicy, for short. And, she is short. But, she's hot. And she's the perfect "S," in profile as she boasts a 32D, naturally. What keeps me from hating her is I have the natural wobble booty, which just can't be contained.

But, put the two of us together ... and we don't f*ck around.

She used to work at my firm as a paralegal ... until she was fired about 4 months ago.

We went to a late lunch today which first consisted of a shared appetizer and water but then turned into perfect margaritas.

Spicy: Did you know I haven't seen the managing partner since he fired me?

Sugar Free: I just gave him a lap dance.

Spicy: Come again?

Sugar Free: He did, twice.

Spicy pours herself another drink.